Still want to conduct? Really?

Another example of how challenging it is to become a conductor:

My high school orchestra director once told the class about a course he took in college.  The students had been asked to bring staff paper.  The instructor put on a record.  After several minutes, he said, "That should be enough time.  You should now be able to start writing the overture."

Once again, conducting isn't for the faint of heart.

An overlooked cover tune XIV

Earlier today, WSIE played Cheryl Bentyne's version of Cole Porter's "Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye," which I haven't heard often.  The Manhattan Transfer singer is in excellent voice, making it easy for the listener to hear the sorrow one can have when switching "from major to minor."  Although the lyrics work fine as sentiments between two people saying goodnight, I think they're also appropriate when visiting someone's grave.  Bentyne's version conveys wistful sentiments in an elegant arrangement, making the song suitable for Memorial Day remembrances or more temporary partings.

An above average grade, but...

One of the more direct examples of my middle and high school orchestra director leveling with a student:

Mr. D.:  You need to practice more.
Student:  But, last quarter, I got a B+ in orchestra.
Mr. D.:  That was to encourage you.

Easing that audition tension

At age 15, I stepped on stage to audition for an orchestra composed of high school and college students.  It amused me when the orchestra manager said to the conductor and section coach, "Let's go ahead and give him the scotch."

I laughed to myself, knowing what she actually meant.  The audition judges did not provide alcohol to soothe auditioning students' jangled nerves.  She corrected herself, adding, "...the Scotch symphony, I mean."

Would scotch have taken the edge off of my audition, as I played excerpts from Felix Mendelssohn's third symphony?  Probably not, as I've never cared much for the taste of alcohol.  Still, it would have been a considerate gesture.

Context? XI

Heard on a noncommercial FM station: "This next request goes out to Swiss cheese..."

...Or, perhaps the DJ played the song for someone who went by the code name, Swiss Cheese.  I didn't hear the song that Swiss cheese (or Swiss Cheese) requested, but that intro got me thinking.  What song would Swiss cheese request?  Is there a blues tune called "Bland And Melted (On The Charred Burger Of Life)" in which Swiss cheese wallowed? 

Admittedly, it's presumptuous to assume that Swiss cheese would request a song about cheese.  All cats, after all, don't gravitate toward the music of Cat Stevens, nor do all dogs listen exclusively to Three Dog Night.

If Swiss Cheese was someone's code name, perhaps the listener was the mascot for a dairy company.  In the '80s, a morning DJ signed an autograph for me and included a thumbprint of the sponsoring company's ice cream.   I still remember that more than 30 years later, so I imagine it would be even more memorable to meet a company's dancing cheese slice.  The mascot could adopt the nickname, Swiss Cheese, and use it as a conversation starter on a resume.

So, who is this Swiss cheese or Swiss Cheese?  What song did this mysterious listener request on that day approximately two years ago?  Alas, some mysteries are never solved.

Persistent earworm alert XXVI

Whenever I see an article about the discovery of new planets, I start wondering the same things as most readers.  I wonder how far away the planets are from Earth, what their climates are like, and whether they can support life.  Also, however, I wonder why, of all the space-themed music that could come to mind, I start thinking of a Carpenters tune, "Calling Occupants Of Interplanetary Craft," reflexively.  The song was a modest hit in 1977, and I haven't heard it on the radio in decades.  I don't dislike it, but I wonder why ELO's "Twilight," Deodato's rendition of the Strauss piece, "Also Sprach Zarathustra," or any movement from Holst's "The Planets," which I'd expect to hear in the back of my mind, don't strike me first. 

When it comes to go-to songs about space, who knows how the mind works?

High school orchestra or New York Philharmonic? Who can tell?

My brother once played a recording of an impressive keyboard riff.

"That's good," I said.  "Is that you playing the keyboard?"

"No," he replied. "That's Bruce Hornsby."

Oops.

"Hmmm," I thought.  "I might as well supplement an inadvertent mistake with a deliberate one."

"Nice lamp," I said, nodding toward a lamp that was obviously store-bought.  "Did you make that?"

As people say when driving on ice, it's often advisable to steer into the skid.

No pressure, then...

I remember sitting in the audience at a bass recital when a nervous player stood before us and took several deep breaths.  Sensing the player's apprehension, the bass teacher called out, "Don't worry.  Just play something, and then, we'll clap."

I still think that was a smart way to put the player and the audience at ease.

Online radio sampler highlights XXXVII

Five standout tracks I've heard today:

KCSN (Los Angeles, CA)

• Dirty Work-Steely Dan (An unusual sing-along quality in the chorus for a song about an affair; David Palmer pulls off lead vocals effectively on this early Steely Dan track.)
• Hear Me-Tedeschi Trucks Band (Susan Tedeschi has a knack for conveying just the right amount of bluesy angst in her vocals.  This midtempo tune, released in January, is one of many tracks that illustrates this.)

KUTX (Austin, TX)

• House Of Mercy-Sarah Jarosz (I hear elements of Stevie Nicks in the vocals and instrumentation.  That influence, along with Jarosz's previous strong CDs, makes me curious to hear her new "Undercurrent" release, due out June 17.)

KVMR (Nevada City, CA)

• Loca-Buika (These appealing flamenco vocals and instrumentation wouldn't be out of place on a jazz station.)

WPKN (Bridgeport, CT)

• Don't Misunderstand-Harold Mabern featuring Norah Jones (Excellent synchronicity between piano and vocals here; I'd expect no less from artists of this caliber.)

An overlooked cover tune XIII

After listening to Victor Wooten's CD, "A Show Of Hands," recently, it surprises me that I've never heard any track from it on the radio.  I'm especially surprised that his cover of Stevie Wonder's "Overjoyed" hasn't gotten the airplay it deserves.  Wonder's original vocals are excellent, and Esperanza Spalding's bass-and-vocals cover is strong, as well.  Wooten, however, proves that the tune works just as well as a bass solo.  His arrangement conjures up a floating sensation during the verses, making it a relaxing take on a well-known hit.  I also learned tonight that Wooten had worked out the arrangement long before "A Show Of Hands" was released in 1996.  Check out his 1987 performance of it on YouTube, and be impressed.

Persistent earworm alert XXV

When things are going your way, it's tempting to believe that everything will stay that way.  You don't know that things will continue on a positive course, but you try not to think about that.  That's the theme of today's persistent earworm, "Prime Time," a minor Alan Parsons Project hit from 1984.  Eric Woolfson sings, "Every move I make feels like a winner," and suspects there's "something in the air, turning me around and guiding me right."  The instrumental backdrop, however, is consistently ominous, reminding the listener, as Woolfson sings, "All of the plans I make won't come together."  The protagonist has "a premonition" that "it's gonna be my turn tonight," and I wonder if he's about to place a risky bet at a casino.  What happens after that?  The lyrics don't address that, making the listener wonder.

Appropriate ice cream truck music

Former KMOX personality Jim White used to mention the Ernestine Ulmer quote, "Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first," on his talk show.  I remembered this recently as I listened to Mayer Hawthorne's tune, "The Stars Are Ours."  Hawthorne's song embraces the "Live for today" attitude of Ulmer's quote, so I'm fairly certain I'd buy ice cream from a truck that uses the song's chorus as its theme music.  After all, hearing "The Stars Are Ours" in a typical ice cream truck's calliope-style arrangement would amuse and impress me to no end.  If the ice cream truck played this theme music and had Ulmer's quote painted on the side, that would be doubly impressive and would warrant buying at least three ice cream bars.  Who couldn't appreciate such a smart marketing gimmick?

Pledge drive hilarity?

It should go without saying, but if you volunteer to answer phones during a radio station's pledge drive, take the phone calls without giggling.  Years ago, I called a station to make a pledge, and a volunteer could barely get through the name of the station when she answered because she was giggling so much.  She continued to giggle throughout the call, while asking, "What is your name?  What is your phone number?  What amount would you like to pledge?  Would you like a premium?"  I don't know if she'd just been told the world's funniest joke before answering the phone or if someone was making silly faces at her across the room, but her inability to get it together during the call made me wonder if the station really needed the money.

One cat's cryptic take on a lyric

A scene from this afternoon:

My cat, Sylvia, and I were listening to "The Littlest Birds" by The Be Good Tanyas.  We had this exchange:

Me (quoting the chorus:) So, do "the littlest birds sing the prettiest songs," in your opinion?
Sylvia (softly, after a considered pause:) Mew.

Sylvia has a vet appointment coming up, so I wonder if the vet will translate her answer as a yes or a no.

An overlooked cover tune XII

When you hear the song title, "Last Train To Clarksville," you probably think of the reasonably catchy version by The Monkees.  George Benson's version also deserves its due, however.  Benson and company prove that the tune, when performed at a faster tempo, works just as well for guitar, organ, and brass.  When I hear Benson's version, I think, "There's a train that will definitely get you to your destination on time, or more likely, early.  Saying that the locomotive chugs right along doesn't do it justice."  You might hear it every once in a great while on a good traditional jazz or smooth jazz station.

Still want to conduct?

My former bass teacher once talked about how difficult it is to be an aspiring orchestra conductor.

"When conductors are being trained, it's kind of like the military," she said.  "The instructor tears the students down..."

"...And then builds them back up?" I asked.

"No, it's more like, 'Leave the carnage there on the floor,'" she replied.

Conducting isn't for the faint of heart.

FM dial scan highlights LVIII

Seven of the better songs I've heard since Tuesday:

KDHX 88.1 FM

• Someone To Watch Over Me-Willie Nelson (Nelson's credible cover of "Someone..." might surprise some listeners; he sings it convincingly, however, and makes it his own.  Also recommended: Nelson's cover of "All Of Me.")
• Killin' Kind-Shelby Lynne (Who hasn't been on at least one side of this equation?)
• Ready For Love-The Rascals (One of the band's overlooked efforts; if you like the feel of the keyboard part on Jesse Colin Young's "Ridgetop" or "Sunlight," you'll likely also enjoy the keyboard and flute backing on this track.)

WSIE 88.7 FM

• Mornin'-Al Jarreau (Jarreau's sunniest vocals; to my ears, it's a strong highlight of Jarreau's most appealing album, "Jarreau."  Also recommended: "Step By Step," "Save Me," "Love Is Waiting," "Trouble In Paradise," "I Will Be Here For You," and, really, the rest of the album.)
• The Lady Wants To Know-Michael Franks (Smooth, subtle vocals, with appropriately laid-back instrumentation.)

KCLC 89.1 FM

• Spring To Come-John Butler Trio (Don't give up hope, even if you only have a smidgen of it.  Allow the vocals and guitar to cheer you up at least a little.  Bibio's "Lovers' Carvings" would segue well with this.)

KWMU 90.7 FM 

• Blues For Peter (Live)-Mary Lou Williams (Initially, the tune reminded me of "Sentimental Journey," taken in a new, imaginative direction.  This is a fine piano instrumental in its own right, however.)

A smart, mild dismissal

A caller on an AM radio talk show had just stepped down from his soap box.  The host responded, without any hint of fire in his voice, "I could not disagree more, but that's my problem, I suppose."  I still think that was a smart way of saying, "Your take on this issue is deeply flawed, but there's no point in getting worked up over it and picking it apart."  I thought it was one of the most adult ways to tell a caller, "Whatever," in essence.

Persistent earworm alert XXIV

Today's persistent earworm: Jorge Ben's "Ponta de Lanca Africano (Umbabarauma)."  Actually, this has been a recurring earworm for me since at least 1992, when I played it on KCOU.  One listen is all it takes to cement its melody in your mind.  I'm not surprised that it was used in a commercial in which animal toys came to life.  My guess would be that the toy outlet's sales went up that Christmas season, and that the recipients, as well as the buyers, of the chain's toy giraffes and elephants ended up singing the word, "Umbabarauma," reflexively, more than they realized.

Theme music fit for a talk show

Has any talk show host ever used the lyric, "I can't complain, but sometimes, I still do," from Joe Walsh's "Life's Been Good" as theme music?  If not, that's surprising; depending on how you look at it, that lyric can apply easily to a host or a show's callers.

"You're not the harbinger of doom I thought you were!"

It's interesting to learn how you're perceived on the air.  Reading between the lines, I was amused to learn that one DJ who worked with me thought, at first, that I must not be very humorous.  She told me her first impression upon hearing me was, "What authority that guy has in his voice.  No way he's a crack-up."  Then, as she got to know me, she discovered I had a sense of humor, after all.  I kept her initial impression in mind when working at other radio stations.  I always strived to sound credible, but not to the point of being grim and dour.  It's funny how one impression, even a largely complimentary one, can have a lasting impact on an announcer.

No commercials? Here's your filler music.

What do you do when you're a radio announcer at a small AM station, and it's time to take a break?  At most stations, you'd have a set of commercials to play.  If your station doesn't have that, though, you can fill time the way one station here did years ago--by playing part of George Benson's "Breezin'" until the next interview, commentary, or show is ready to go.  It's one of the best jazz guitar melodies ever recorded, after all, and it's familiar to most listeners.  Although the radio station that used it as transition music was short-lived, I came to appreciate its use as the station's signature theme.  It was a good way of saying, in effect, "Let's kick back and take a breather before delving into another serious topic."

Can't sing? It's not your fault.

I remember a grade school vocal music teacher saying she was thinking of recording each of us singing a solo.  Her reasoning was that she had "very little to go on when determining grades."  I believe, as I did then, that no grade school student should have to sing a solo.  I wanted to tell her, "We're not college students majoring in vocal performance.  It's grade school, and we're taking this class because it's required.  We're not all natural singers, nor do we all have the ability to be great vocalists."  She also told the class, "When that middle school chorus teacher says, 'You're going to sing solos,' you're going to."  Fortunately, the teacher didn't ask us to sing solos, after all.  Both middle school chorus teachers, to their credit, told their classes, "I will never ask you to sing by yourselves."

I've always believed that the ability to sing is much like the ability to type.  You can improve a little bit through practice, but, for the most part, you're stuck with the level of ability you have.  Certainly, in grade school and middle school, you shouldn't be penalized for lacking an ability that's largely beyond your control.

Stingray Music highlights XXIII

Some of the better selections I heard yesterday:

Alt Rock Classics 

• Like The Weather-10,000 Maniacs (One of the group's most tuneful melodies; Natalie Merchant sings about having a "shiver in my bones, just thinking about the weather," but you get the feeling everything will turn out fine.)

The Blues 

• Down So Low-Mother Earth (Tracy Nelson emotes convincingly as she sings, conveying grit, passion, and wistfulness equally well.)

Cocktail Lounge

• Do You Know The Way To San Jose-Trijntje Oosterhuis (Dionne Warwick's version is the definitive one for me, but these vocals do the tune justice, as well.) 

Cool Jazz 

• I Get A Kick Out Of You-Louis Armstrong (Armstrong's vocals were always sincere, as demonstrated here.)
• Pennies From Heaven-Dave Brubeck (Brubeck pushes the rhythm forward on piano, and the entire ensemble cooks on this one.  No surprise there...)

Everything '80s

• Got My Mind Set On You-George Harrison (Harrison's vocals are in fine form on this catchy cover of a James Ray tune.)

Folk Roots

• Farewell, My Love, And Remember Me-Eileen Ivers featuring Tim Shelton (Lyrically and vocally, the song flows smoothly with "Paddy's Green Shamrock Shore" by The High Kings.)

Jazz Masters

• Sugar-Stanley Turrentine (Turrentine plays tenor sax on this sly walk of a melody and has ample assistance from such heavy hitters as Freddie Hubbard, George Benson, Ron Carter, and Lonnie Smith.)

SiriusXM highlights XLIII

Saturday morning highlights:

'40s Junction

• Walkin' My Baby Back Home-Jo Stafford (When I worked at WEW, this was always a reliable tune to play when I needed a bouncy,  midtempo vocal segue.  Nat King Cole's and George Benson's versions are also recommended.)

The Coffee House 

• Instead-Madeleine Peyroux (Peyroux's vocals on "Instead" bring Leon Redbone's song stylings to mind.)

Deep Tracks 

• Pretzel Logic-Steely Dan (One of the band's more nostalgic, blues-based tunes.)

Escape

• Sleepy Lagoon-Al Hirt (A respectable piece for a confident trumpeter.)

Jam_On

• Steal My Kisses-Ben Harper (This has to be a fun tune for a guitarist or bassist to play.  It doesn't wear out its welcome easily.)

The Joint

• Sitting In Limbo-Jimmy Cliff (Good lyrics acknowledge the uncertainty that comes with major transitions in one's life.)

Soul Town 

• Misdemeanor-Foster Sylvers (This tune isn't usually played on the radio today, but if you like the feel of The Jackson 5's midtempo and uptempo tracks, you might also like "Misdemeanor.")

Symphony Hall 

• Silvius Leopold Weiss: Suite No. XIV (David Russell, guitar) (An enjoyable, immediately accessible Baroque piece.)

"GREAT SONG, ISN'T IT?!"

When you're in high school, it's fun, at first, to have the newfound freedom of driving.  You get to control where you go, how fast you go, and the volume at which you listen to music.  I was never one for playing music at top volume, but once, a friend gave me a ride home from school while the music in the car sounded loud enough to make the windows rattle.  I remember our conversation going like this:

Me: THANKS FOR OFFERING ME A RIDE HOME!
Friend: NO PROBLEM! 
Me: HEY, I KNOW THIS SONG!  THAT'S "SLAM" BY DAVID SANBORN!
Friend: YEAH, IT'S GREAT JAZZ!  IT'S A GREAT SONG TO CRANK UP FULL BLAST!
Me: APPARENTLY!  SO, HOW DID YOU DO ON THE QUIZ TODAY?!
Friend: NOT BAD!  I ONLY MISSED ONE!  HOW 'BOUT YOU?!
Me: I ONLY MISSED ONE, AS WELL!
Friend: GOOD!  FORTUNATELY, IF YOU DID THE READING, YOU DID WELL ON THE QUIZ!
Me: YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!
(A short while later, as Sanborn's music continued to rattle the windows:)
Friend: SO, IS THIS THE STREET?!
Me: YES!
Friend: I TURN HERE, THEN?!
Me: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT!
Friend: WHICH HOUSE IS IT?!
Me: IT'S THE SECOND ONE ON THE RIGHT!
Friend: OK, SO I PULL INTO THIS DRIVEWAY?!
Me: YEP!
Friend (pulling into the driveway): OK, WELL, THERE YOU ARE!
Me: THANKS AGAIN FOR THE RIDE!
Friend: YOU'RE WELCOME!  SEE YOU TOMORROW!
Me: OK!  SEE YOU THEN!

For some reason, when you're in high school, it doesn't necessarily strike you as odd to have an entire shouted conversation.  Fortunately, that didn't happen again.

Stingray Music highlights XXII

Thursday morning standouts:

Chamber Music 

• Robert Schumann: Drei Romanzen, Op. 94 (Rivka Golani, viola; Bernadene Blaha, piano) (A resonant, gripping viola tone drew me into this piece.)

Cocktail Lounge

• Rocking Voices-Jankowski Singers & Horst Jankowski (The Swingle Singers meet Sergio Mendes & Brasil '66?)

Folk Roots

• Echo In The Hills-Carrie Elkin & Danny Schmidt (Quiet, endearing vocals.) 

Hungarian Pop & Rock

• Mashol varnak-Blahalouisiana (Appealingly retro vocals, whirling organ, and an engaging hook.  It's one of the most tuneful songs I've heard in a while.  It would flow well after "Fine" by The Cardigans.)

Jazz Latino

• Una Tarde En Alamar-Paquito D'Rivera (The flute line and warm rhythmic backing make me wonder why I haven't heard this tune on the radio more often, at least at night.)

Jazz Masters 

• Freddie Freeloader-Miles Davis (Two repeated, perfectly placed notes carry the melody of this legendary track from the "Kind Of Blue" album.)

Retro R&B 

• That's Where It's At-Sam Cooke (Vocally and instrumentally, the tune segues smoothly with Cooke's "Bring It On Home To Me.")

The Spa

• Reflechir-Alain Morier (A pleasant midtempo guitar piece.)

SiriusXM highlights XLII

Noteworthy tracks heard Wednesday morning:

'60s On 6 

• Good Morning Starshine-Oliver (A great anthem for anyone who's a sunny idealist or needs to become one.)

'70s On 7 

• Couldn't Get It Right-Climax Blues Band (An unusual lead voice keeps the tune chugging along.)

Escape 

• Theme From "Route 66"-Nelson Riddle and his orchestra (This was the first tune I played on the air at WEW, and I still think it's a strong choice.  It's perfectly structured, sets the scene, and builds on itself, ending on a commanding note.)

The Loft 

• Thank You Friends (Demo)-Big Star (Regardless of whether its lyrics are sincere or sarcastic, Alex Chilton pulls this off.  It was good to hear it in concert during the band's 1993 Columbia, Missouri performance.)

No Shoes Radio 

• Toes-Norah Jones (Jones sings this warning about a river's current in her always captivating, soothing voice.  It's a highlight of the "Feels Like Home" CD.)

ONEderland 

• All For You-Sister Hazel (I remember hearing this for the first time when it was a hit.  WVRV, "The River," played it, and the tune's country-rock flavor made me wonder if the station had changed formats.  The tune's sing-along quality and well-harmonized chorus appeal to me as much as they did in 1997.  I'm curious to hear some of the other one-hit wonders that might be played on this new ONEderland station.)

Real Jazz

• Con Alma-Dizzy Gillespie (One of Gillespie's spiciest numbers, with a "1, 2, cha, cha, cha" feel.)

Soul Town

• In The Rain-The Dramatics (Compellingly sung, with effective use of thunder and reverb.  This oldie deserves more radio airplay.)

Velvet

• Tomorrow Is My Turn-Rhiannon Giddens (Beautifully sung, and fit for an epic production.  This was the title track from one of last year's strongest CDs.)

Watercolors

• Kissed By Nature-Eliane Elias (A sly piano line underscores cool, subtle vocals.  Given the consistency of her work, I'd recommend just about anything Elias plays or sings.)

Making the best of a late start

If you're a DJ, how would you handle this situation?  Your air shift is over.  You know the next DJ is in the building, but you don't know where.  I remember this scenario happening on KYKY in 1983 or '84.  After the DJ whose shift was over yelled to the DJ who was due in next and got no reply, this is what I remember happening:

DJ 1:  I guess he's still preoccupied.  Well, OK...(The album version of Styx's "Babe" starts playing.) "Between rock and a soft place..."

(DJ 2 starts yelling in the background.)

DJ 1:  Oh!  Sit down, sit down, sit down...

DJ 2: "Between rock and a soft place..."

DJ 1:  Oh, I already said that.

DJ 2:  Really?  Did you say, "Adult Rock, KY98?"

DJ 1:  No.

DJ 2:  Did you say, "Thirty minutes of continuous music begin right now?"

DJ 1:  No.

DJ 2:  Did you say, "Styx starts it off with 'Babe' on KY98?"

DJ 1:  Nope.

DJ 2:  Well, now, you've said it all.

---

Now, that's how you handle an unexpected transition.

Persistent earworm alert XXIII

A rainy morning was all it took for me to recall a tune by The Rainmakers, a band I hadn't heard in years.  "Rockin' At The T-Dance" isn't usually played on the radio today, but the shouted "1, 2, 3!" count-in before the guitars start wailing has stayed with me for years.  Its repetition helps the tune, I think.  Usually, when a band announces a count-in, it's done in the style of The Rascals on "Good Lovin'."  The count-in to three--or four, in some songs--primes the listener to listen, sing along, or play air guitar.  The Rainmakers take this a step further by making the count-in a recurring part of the song.  Although I'm fairly ambivalent about the tune, I'll admit that it sports one of the stronger uses of a count-in.

Online radio sampler highlights XXXVI

Five standout tracks heard tonight:

KAFM (Grand Junction, CO)

• Not A Care In The World-Bill Charlap Trio (From a quiet, piano-anchored new release of covers, "Notes From New York."  Also recommended: Charlap's versions of "A Sleepin' Bee" and "I'll Remember April.")

KALX (Berkeley, CA)

• Daylight Saving Time-Sandy Edmonds (A bouncy melody from '67 that incorporates a lot of the '60s Motown sound.)

WDNA (Miami, FL)

• Swing Spring-Joe Henderson (Henderson's saxophone guides this upbeat melody.  Each player has a chance to shine on this expansive number.)

WSPS (Concord, NH)

• Corazon Espinado-Santana (For casual Santana fans who don't know much of the group's music beyond "Smooth," this is a good starting point.  The tune contains a good helping of "Smooth"'s feel...)
• Entre Abismos-Jose Alberto "El Canario" (...and this faster piece segues well with it.)